Evening Echo, Saturday July 26, 2008 - Cork Main Drainage song

Article written by international renowned balled singer Jimmy Crowley about Mick Lynch’s Songs

THE Cork main drainage scheme is finally at an end, following many years of planning and extensive works. Did you ever wonder how the whole thing works? I mean, the responsibility for public health is enormous and very easy to criticise from where we stand; but to be actually responsible for drains and gullies, culverts and streams — all of which must form a veritable anatomy of discharge into the Lee — would be a daunting task.

I smirked at the enthusiasm and naiveté of those who rightly predicted that one day you could swim with impunity into the very arms of the city. It is wonderful to see not only the Lee and the estuary sparkling in pristine clarity, but many little tributaries and culverts along the way. Don’t ask me how they did it, but the evidence is clear. All of us have paid, and paid heavily, in inconvenience, but the long wait has been worth it. Here is what the City Hall said of the main drainage scheme:

‘‘Since the beginning of 2004, the necessary pipework and pumping systems were in place to convey the city’s sewerage, and also flows from the Douglas area of the county, to the new Treatment Plant at Carrigrenan, Little Island.  
“The Treatment Plant is fully operational and passed from the construction phase of the contract to the operational phase in August 2004. 
“A very high quality effluent is being achieved, far in excess of what is required under the EU Wastewater Directive. The improvement of water quality is already apparent. 
“Cork City Council has responsibility for the maintenance of all the main sewers and culverts in the city. There are approximately 200 miles of such sewers. They also maintain the large interceptor sewers, which have been laid over the past number of years.
“There are, at present, 56 storm overflow chambers and eight storm water holding tanks, which require regular maintenance. There are 14 small pump houses and one major pump house at Gilabbey, all of which require attention.
“Even as we sleep, a huge pipe, over three metres in diameter, is being laid from the Atlantic Pond Pumping Station to the city, a distance of 2.6 kilometers.
“A tunnelling machine is boring away, independent, along the line of Monaghan Road and Victoria Road, towards Kennedy Quay, unnoticed by the road users, cyclists and strollers overhead.’’

I told you two weeks ago about how I had the pleasure of hearing Mick Lynch sing his amazing ballads at Seánie Driscoll’s Sunday afternoon session at Charlie’s Bar, Union Quay. Just as profound a subject and as worthy of immortalisation as his last subject, Mattie Kiely’s famous chipper, is today’s ballad on the Main Drainage Scheme.  You can sing it almost to The Banks, with a bit of embellishment for the extra notes, and you’ll get great mileage out of it.

Ballads, after all, are meant to be sung by the people and not to be let go musty in drawers.

O brave Father Mathew, who’s stood
for so long,
His nostrils assailed by a murderous pong.
Will along with the rest
of us soon be relieved,
To be walking up Pana and able to breathe.
On loungers and lilos all summer we’ll loll,
And stride at low tide on the beach
at North Mall;
We’ll be swimming with dolphins at Sullivan’s Quay,
When they finish the main drainage scheme.
We’ll be reeling in salmon to
keep in the fridge,
Each day at high tide from the
Christy Ring Bridge.
And the ferries from Mahon and
Passage to Cork,
Will sail through the gale just to get
us to work.
Off Morrison’s Island on house
boats we’ll float,
And leave out our scraps for the
otters and stoat;
We’ll see fish, fur and fowl that we’d never have dreamed,
When they finish the main drainage scheme.
When the weather is bad and the rain
it pours down,
There’ll be white water rafting from Sunbeam to town,
Where in all of the restaurants and
all the cafes,
You’ll see freshly caught mullet as
fish of the day;
We’ll be bottling water called Eau de Chorcaí,
And our ales will be hailed as the cream of the Lee;
There’ll be shouts of delight from the beoirs and the feens,

When they finish the main drainage scheme. 

Article reproduced here with thanks to John Dolan, Features Editor, Cork Evening Echo